a.w.c.h.

Why must this pain come around?

I can take on any kind of pain, any problem, every challenge that comes my way.. because you're there.. giving me strength and joy.. but what'll happen after you leave..? Where will I find the strength to go on and continue living life?

Sure, you may say that it would simply be 'physical' separation.. but things would be so different.. so lonely.. so painful..

Dinosaur is lonely without Chicken..

when you're near, i don't need stupid glasses.. seeing you clearly is enough..

when you speak, when you laugh, i don't need to hear what people call music.. your voice is enough..

I know how fast time runs..

And I'm running out of it..

Man.. if only I can run away from it's claws..

This is hurting too much.. and not even this happiness that I feel inside can stop my wounds from bleeding..

I want to hold on to you forever.. if only forever exists..

I can try to laugh, I can try to forget..

But hard as it is,

I can't pretend that it doesn't hurt..

banging my head on the keyboard..

hurting so much..

dying so fast..

madalas pala akong matahimik at mapaisip.. kala nyo bored na ako at walang magawa.. pero ewan..

napapadalas ang pagtitig ko sa kalawakan.. sa kawalan.. sa kalayaan ng mga damdamin..

waw.. ako ba to?

I knew this was going to be happy, from the very start..

But i was also aware that this happiness could only be temporary..

I also knew that this was going to hurt so much more than how much it brings me joy..

I had the chance to turn back, and I know that I still do..

But I didn't, and I won't..

Not now, not ever..

And this is only for one good reason..

I love you.

It may (and I bet it does) sound mushy..

But I can't help it..

why can't i scream when i want to?

why can't i cry when i need to?

magaling siguro akong magtrain sa sarili..

I have trained myself well.. that I don't cry.

And now that I really need to release this pain.. I just can't..

I don't cry, and I don't just scream..

gusto kong magwala.. pero di ko kaya..

And now I'm weak..

This pain is killing me.

I'm too weak..

I'm too lost..

without you.

mushy ako.

-+reish.121804.